Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Cool - but not that cool.

This is the tree at the end of my road.

Check it check it! The streetlamp has created it's own tiny microclimate and its warmth has let a few select leaves enjoy an extended autumn. Poor leaves, harsh winds are coming and their days are numbered.

A wide shot in case you didn't believe me.


Tuesday, November 13, 2007

It's time to start RUNNING!

Has anyone seen THIS? It has been accused of being voyeuristic, abusive and immoral blah blah etc etc. For me it doesn't go far enough. Why has no-one commissioned "Hunting Fat Kids". Teary strops will never be as entertaining as sheer blind terror. Plus it would help them lose weight. As long as we use less than two dogs it would be nice and legal.

"On your marks tubby!"

Whilst we are at it, can anyone explain why these shows have yet to be made?

"Monkey Tennis" - Alan Partridge did have SOME good ideas.

"The Stocks Market" - Criminal chavs are held before a kangaroo court, and then put in the stocks in a marketplace for a day.

"Top 10 Nazi Sharks From Hell" - I see Channel 5 for this one.

"Changing Rooms" - ditto, just think about it.

"Celebrity Auschwitz" Given time, this will actually happen. Vanessa Feltz to win.

"Is your house where you live?" - LOSER!

"The Ex Factor" - Idiots on ITV bitch incoherently about former partners.

"Penal Corectitude" - Lifers compete to win their freedom, a penis enlargement and a career in porn.

"Saturday Night, Takeaway Ant and Dec" - Please

"What's Up Doc?" - Unqualified imbecilic idiots argue with the editor of the Lancet and head of the BMA as to why they should be allowed to become a surgeon. The most obnoxious and stupid carries out a live televised triple bypass.

"Great Undertakings" - Winner deals with the inevitable results of the above.


Monday, November 05, 2007

Welcome to my grim urban hell

Sunrise from the kitchen.

Fog on the Hills

Early morning in West Malvern

Oooh how I miss London.